Thought

well, it's 1210am now. Promised my baby I'll go to sleep but this thought keep spinning in my head. I'm sorry, I keep crying instead of sleeping so I think I should just sit up and write something. One of my close friend just told me that she's going to study in other state next week which is pretty fast and tbh Im shock. Yes I did expect she's going to study in other places but I didn't expect it'll be this fast in fact she has no idea too. And all of a sudden I feel like I'm awake, by the fact that my friends are going to leave for their studies. I don't know why im acting like a kid, at first I was cool with it and I think that it's still okay cuz we can still keep in touch through these social network, FaceTime etc. But then I just realize things are not going to be the same anymore. They won't be by my side when I need them or I can't be at there when they're weak. This hits me pretty hard, cuz those friends who are leaving are the one who are close with me. I mean they had been in my life for years and I'll definitely won't be the same me as now if they're not there. They're like a part of my life.
So, I guess this is a part of growing up huh. You have to accept the fact that the people you want can't stay with you forever, they might leave to chase their dreams and all you can do is only just wishing them the best of luck, hoping them won't get hurt or something and can get a smooth path to their dreams. I'm sorry if I'm talking craps I have no idea what I'm talking about I just suddenly miss them and I'm afraid because I don't want any of them to leave. I hope they'll always be safe and happy with their choice.
Sometimes I do hope that time can just stop when I'm only six years old. When your biggest fear is just waking up alone and can't find your parents in room. There's no complicated feelings.

1229am, goodnight.